Sookie is still screaming once she sees that Lafayette is possessed with the zombie eyes. He tells Tara and Eggs to take the “Egg” downstairs, then commands Sookie to take off her clothes [creepy!]. Never fear, Lafayette doesn’t swing that way, he just wants Sookie to put on a bridesmaid dress before taking her downstairs. Tara, Arlene, and Jane [the town drunk] are fawning over a bridal Maryann. Turns out Maryann’s borrowing both Gran’s house and her wedding dress [what a bitch].
Maryann asks everyone to leave so she can be alone with maid of honor Sookie. She wants Sookie to zap her again with her Electricity. Sookie attempts to zap her and only succeeds in pushing her in the chest [prompting Maryann to say she is not fully committing to this]. Maryann again asks Sookie what she is, cause she definitely isn’t human; otherwise Maryann would be able to control her and give her the zombie eyes. Sookie gets fed up and finally responds “I’m a waitress, what the f*ck are you?” [Awesome!]
Maryann asks Sookie if she has ever felt anything watching over her [and we see a flashback to the pilot episode when she slung that chain around the Rattray’s neck]. Maryann mentions that Sookie isn’t the only non-human in town, and Sookie jumps to the conclusion that it is Sam she wants to marry. Maryann is insulted; she is marrying a God, and Sam is only the perfect vessel that once got away years ago. They need Sam’s heart as the food of the Gods to feed him back into exsistence. Maryann plans to use Sookie to have a bait-and-switch with Sam for her ceremony. We also find out that the “Egg” is just an ordinary ostrich egg, used to represent fertility in the ceremony, but they still have to creep it out by having all the bridesmaids lick it [seriously, why?] Sookie refuses to participate in the ceremony until Maryann threatens to harm Jason.
Hoyt is trying to keep Maxine safe at home and away from Sookie’s house. He appears to be sleep deprived and has resorted to a boy scout’s trick of tying a string across the kitchen and attached to his hand to let him know if Mama tries to escape. She continues to spew her hatred but to no avail; Hoyt is not letting her go anywhere. Once Maryann is killed, Maxine regains consciousness and is disgusted that Hoyt would let Jessica feed on her. Hoyt tells her that he left Jessica because of that, but changes his mind when he finds out the truth about his Dad. He goes to Jessica’s to apologize but finds no one home as Jessica is now using her virginal disguise to pick up and feed on truckers at the rest stop.
Back at the Queen’s mansion, it appears that Eric has taken Bill’s place in the Vampire Yahtzee game. Queen Sophie Ann offers her condolences about Godric, then interrupts him to discuss the Maenad and Sookie. She also wants to know how Bill found out about humans selling Vampire Blood for her. Eric is shocked that she knows, but the guards hear everything. He reassures her that Bill only knows about the trading, but not that it is on the Queen’s orders; She throws him down and flashes fang until he responds that he will take care of Bill Compton. [PS – Eric sucks at Yahtzee].
Andy and Jason plan is to ambush the party and save the town. They overlook the dancing and revelry in front of Gran’s house. They make their move and are apprehended in about 2 seconds flat. Next thing you know they both have the zombie eyes [oh man, them too...this is getting old].
Bill and Sam are in the bar discussing what to do about Maryann. Bill commands Sam to go with him and give himself to Maryann. They arrive at the ceremony and Bill trades Sookie for Sam. Sookie is appalled that he brought Sam into direct danger and certain death. Bill pleads for Sookie to trust him as they watch on. Sam gets tied up and Eggs stabs him in the chest while Sookie screams. Maryann licks his blood and proclaims him the true vessel. Sookie breaks free of Bill and runs to try to apologize Sam. Sam speaks to Sookie telepathically and tells her to destroy it all, so Sookie snaps to action and smashes the eggs and pushes over the Meat Tree.
Maryann is so mad that the ceremony is ruined that she attempts to harm the possessed ones before busting out the claws and chasing after Sookie [round 2]. Just as Sookie falls to the ground, a great white bill appears and stuns Maryann. After all these years she believes her Bull-God has arrived. The bull approaches her and suddenly gouges his horn into her. She is willing to die as the bull’s horn transforms into an arm – it’s Sam, and he yanks out her heart and smashes it, FINALLY killing Maryann [and is it just me or did she transform into the Crypt Keeper’s bride]. Everyone celebrates! Once Sookie had distracted Maryann, Bill was able to give Sam his blood to recover so he could shift into the Bull to kill Maryann. [Hey, does this mean that Sam will have naughty Bill dreams]?
Bill thanks Sam for trusting him, and Sam replied that “you suffer more hiding stuff than you do facing it”….and it looks like Bill has something on his mind regarding that statement….Sam has reflected on all that has happened, and decides he needs to find out who he is and where he comes from. He uses the internet and tracks down his adoptive parents that abandoned him as a teen. He wants to know who is real parents are and his adoptive Mom states they are bad people that he is better off not knowing. His adopted Dad is dying, but feels guilty enough that he gives in to the request by writing down their names and last known location [Magnolia, AR – which is where author Charlaine Harris is from].
The townsfolk are no longer zombie eyes, but seem confused about what has happened. The next day they speculate on what could have caused the mass blackout. Theories such as aliens, the pharmaceutical company poisoning the water supply, and pure ethanol vodka. Apparently that is why you should stick to Mountain Dew…[and women want to wear Sam like a scrunchie]. Jason and Andy are discussing their heroism…even if they can’t remember what happened. You know, because if a tree falls in the woods, it is still a tree [God bless Jason and his sayings].
Eggs is still freaking out that he literally woke with blood on his hands. He corners Sookie and she is stupid enough to open his mind to show him what happened. Eggs sees that he stabbed and removed hearts, and freaks out before taking off running. He appears back at Merlotte’s that night and approaches Andy with the murder weapon. He is there to give himself up but for some reason he throws Andy to the ground and stands over him with the knife. Former soldier Jason assesses the situation and promptly shoots Eggs in the head. Andy tells Jason to give him the gun and run, he will take the blame for it. Tara comes outside and starts screaming and crying [guess she will have to find a new way to annoy us next year].
Sookie receives a package while at work [and at this point I was certain it was an Eric gift, like in the books]; alas, it is a pretty lilac dress from Bill and an invitation for dinner that night. Bill gets suited up and takes Sookie to a nice French restaurant that he has rented out for the evening. After dancing and dinner [for her], he surprises her with plane tickets to Burlington, VT and an engagement ring. He proposes, but Sookie freaks out – she doesn’t even know what she is [plus isn’t her house still in shambles with a fallen Meat Tree in the front yard – is he the king of bad timing or what?]. She runs to the ladies room to compose herself, and realizes that even though she is scared she loves Bill and decides to accept. She rushes back out to tell him, but he’s not there. While she was in the bathroom, someone in gloves used a silver chain to garrote and kidnap him. She rushes back out to tell him, but he’s not there and she softly calls his name….
And that is the end of Season 2. Who took Bill? What’s the fallout from Jason shooting Eggs? Will Sam find his parents? Will Jessica become an AWOL vampire? And where was Eric during all this? Guess we will have to wait until next season to answer these questions and more...Thanks for tuning in!
My Rating: 6.5/10
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