Bill is driving Sookie's POS yellow car like a maniac while as he berates Sookie for undermining his Maker authority. Sookie apologizes, but the yelling continues until Sookie decides that a 20-mile walk back to Bon Temps is preferable to listening to Bill yell. [Note: I have seen enough scary movies to know that it is never a good idea to wander around alone at night]. Jessica taunts that Sookie wants Bill to follow her and kiss and make up, but Bill is stubborn and remains in the car, stating she will come back. Sookie is walking thru the woods when she hears a series of strange noises; she nervously looks around and sees a half-bull/half-man creature off in the distance, and before she can yell WTF it starts running right for her. She runs but before she can get far the creature takes a swipe at her back with some mean-looking claws.
Bill hears Sookie’s scream of pain and does the vampire 100 yd. dash and reaches her in seconds. He sees the injury and immediately offers his healing vampire blood; Sookie drinks and immediately begins convulsing and foaming at the mouth. Bill yells at Jessica to get the car ASAP! They take Sookie to Fangtasia where Eric has summoned Dr. Ludwig to treat Sookie’s wounds. Dr. Ludwig is a no-nonsense little person that is not a fan of the fang, but agrees to treat Sookie. This process involves digging her fingers thru the open wounds to pull out either poisonous nails/egg sacs that react similar to Komodo dragon poisoning; then she starts pouring a liquid that bubbles like acid over the scratches [Gross! Do not eat while watching this episode]. Once she finishes up Bill is able to give his blood, which her body will now accept, but is warned by Eric to slow down lest he “overcook” her.
Bill and Eric agree that they have never heard of a human rejecting vampire blood and wonder what this creature could be. Eric sends Chow and Pam and her sassy pumps to scan the area for signs of this unknown creature. They return and found human tracks with an animal smell. Eric agrees that Pam did have great pumps. Bill doesn’t want to move Sookie so Eric offers up an extra coffin at the bar. Bill also begrudgingly thanks Eric for his help saving Sookie, to which Eric replies that he is sure Bill will find a way to repay him.
Sookie awakens at Fangtasia and a quick look in the mirror shows no permanent damage. Ginger walks in and brings her a disgusting sandwich of peanut butter and chocolate syrup. As they chat Sookie feels that Ginger is hiding something so she reads her mind and discovers that Lafayette is locked in the basement. She beats Ginger to the gun and demands to see Lafayette, where she promises him that she will get him out of there.
Bill awakens that night and is relieved to see that Sookie is healed. Sookie questions Bill about Lafayette and thankfully he is clueless. Eric walks in and states that Lafayette was exchanging sex for vamp blood, which is illegal and within Eric’s rights as a sheriff to investigate. Sookie gets right up in Eric’s face and bitch-slaps him, but he only smiles and complements her attire. However, he is less amused when she threatens to get the police involved, flashing his fangs before stepping back and saying they can come to an arrangement. If Sookie will agree to go to Dallas to look for the missing vampire, then Eric pay for all expenses, plus $10K and agrees to let Lafayette go; she agrees, but only if Bill gets to accompany her to Dallas. Eric has Pam bring Lafayette up from the dungeon. Before she leaves, Sookie and Eric exchange a charged look that seems to be a teaser of things to come…
Meanwhile at the crazy church camp, Jason awakes from nightmares of Eddie and asks for a sign; but it is fellow camper Luke that sends the message in the form of a thrown pillow. The next day they are sharing vampire horror stories at camp. Jason recalls that all the vampires he knows are nice and it was people that killed his loved ones, not the vamps. Sarah twists all his words around by saying his loved ones would be alive if vampires didn’t exist. Jason gets confused and they end up praying together. That night Jason is invited to dinner at Steve and Sarah Newlins where the vampire hatin’ continues. In one of the funniest moments of the night, Steve declares there is a war going on out there; true to form Jason immediately looks over his shoulder out the window…[oh Jason, you are so simple, how can we not love you]. Sarah then brings out her famous dessert, to which Steve tells Jason that he must be pretty special as she doesn’t just whip her pudding out for anyone…[oh snap!]
Maryann has Carl cooking and prepping food to host a small gathering for later that evening. Tara walks in and asks why Sam would hate Maryann. They toss several theories back and forth over breakfast while Maryann prepares the world’s largest joint. Later on Eggs serenades Tara with a lame guitar chord, and they both laugh as they realize she is late for work. She decides to skip, saying it’s just a job and she can always find another one. That night the party is in full swing and Tara and Eggs are making out in the hot tub. Detective Andy is even in attendance and is dumbfounded to see a large reddish brown pig in a playhouse at the party; but when he questions Maryann the pig has disappeared, causing Andy to second-guess what he really saw. When a half-naked chick joins them and offers a back massage, Tara gets annoyed and really starts looking around. She realizes that everyone is getting naked and gyrating on each other in complete abandon. She jumps out of the hot tub and tells Eggs she is not into the “Lifestyle” or him, if that is his scene.
Jessica awakens alone back at the Compton house and is annoyed that Bill and Sookie never came home. In typical teenage fashion, she decides to get all dressed up and head to Merlotte’s for some fun. As she sits down, she makes eye contact with sweet Hoyt, who comes over and offers to buy her a drink. He thinks it’s awesome when she orders a Tru Blood and admits to being a vampire. They continue to flirt awkwardly yet sweetly with each other as they now take the lead for cutest couple on the show. After drinks, Jessica invites Hoyt back to “Vampire Bill’s house”. They discuss playing Wii and before you know it they start making out on the couch. Jessica gets turned on and her fangs pop out; she covers them in embarrassment, but Hoyt tells her it's natural and to never be ashamed of whom she is.
Bill and Sookie drop off Lafayette and continue to drive home while discussing how vampires, like people, are both good and evil; she professes that she hates Eric and knows Bill has a dark side but she knows he also has a good side too. They kiss as they walk in the house before they notice Jessica and Hoyt making out on the couch. Bill quickly rips Jessica of Hoyt and growls at him. [To Be Continued...]
While at Merlotte’s, Sam yells at Daphne for being the world’s worst waitress. Tara offers some wisdom she learns from Maryann, which irritates Sam even more. Sam warns Tara to stay away from Maryann and keep her out of the bar. Sam is fed up with everything and decides it is time to cut and run. The next day Terry catches him packing up the truck and calls him a coward. Sam decides to stay and work one more night before leaving town. Afterwards, he decides for one last run with Dean the dog and jumps in the bayou for a midnight swim. Daphne strolls up and Sam apologizes for being so hard on her; she decides to strip down and join him in the water, and as she pulls off her shirt we see the same scratches that Sookie received. Interesting…
And stay tuned for next week’s episode….
Rating: 9.5 /10
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